Welcome to the 7th installment of "WINE PARAPHERNALIA THAT MAKES US UNCOMFORTABLE AND/OR SCARED" (or W.P.T.M.U.U.A.O.S. for short)

Oh, we need wine for dinner....whatever will we do?  Wait a minute...what are you standing on?  Oh yeah, it's my James-Bond-Villain-Wine-Cellar-Lair I forgot I had because I'm so rich I can afford to forget things like where my wine cellar is and where I'm going to hide your body after I kill you.  Did I say that outloud? 

Anyway, this is great design but sheesh, really?  How many drunk dinner guests have gone head-first down this Hitchcock Movie about alcoholics?  But I'm guessing if you can afford this, you can afford a miniature man-servant who lives at the bottom if your wine cellar and gets your wine for you.  I'm 5'11" when I slouch.  I enjoy cots and canned food and answer to Reginald, Doyle, or "Yoo Hoo, Little Wine Boooy!"

Welcome to the 4th intallment of "WINE PARAPHERNALIA THAT MAKES US UNCOMFORTABLE AND/OR SCARED" (or W.P.T.M.U.U.A.O.S. for short)

Wow, seriously?  Is this so you can drink while using your chainsaw? What on earth do you need both hands free for when drinking?  The Electric Slide is going to get REALLY REALLY messy at cousin Sharon's wedding.  This is only acceptable if off screen he's holding two other glasses of wine in his hands.

   I'm guessing this is some middle-management multitasker's bid to really press the flesh (grchk...i just threw up in my mouth) at those conferences that I'm so, so, so, so happy I don't have to go to anymore. 

I doth protest too much....yes, I want one.